Covered Up Blog

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Reality. It’s Harsh.

Welp, folks, I’m here to deliver some bad news: Jennifer Love Hewitt has authored a book. And it sucks.

The Day I Shot Cupid: Hello, my name is Jennifer Love Hewitt, and I’m a Love-aholic is actually on the shelves. It’s actually. On. The shelves.

If you’re still reading this post, you should know that the book contains a gross overabundance of the following:

1. Words in all caps. (YOU KNOW, LIKE THIS.)

2. Consecutive exclamation points. (We’re talking, like, 23 in a row – no, seriously. Think about how many that is.)

3. Consecutive question marks. (To be fair, she’s more conservative with these – five in a row, tops.)

4. “LOL.” (Wait…I thought this was a book. It’s a text message from a tween? Who knew!)  

5. Horrible dating advice. (This post-breakup remedy, for example: “Make out with a stranger – he must be gorgeous or you’ll feel worse.”)

And to think, there are talented writers out there with something substantive to say, something that could actually impact readers -– in a positive way, I should hasten to add – who struggle to get published. Agents pass them by. Editors move on after a glance.  But name recognition? Well, okay then! Bahda bing, bahda boom!

Sigh.

I think I’ll go eat bon-bons while watching a Party of Five marathon, maybe followed by The Ghost Whisperer.

That’s how depressed it makes me.


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